refuge of color

color.....
i remember going to school for the first time. i was 5 years old and tested out of kindergarten - (not sure how that transpired nor why anyone would desire to do so)- but i found myself in 1st grade with a bunch of strangers who were all a year older than me. it was obvious from the start that my witchy silver-haired teacher, mrs. kneisley, was not supportive of my early promotion to 1st grade and she consequently tried to prove her point by breaking my spirit. even though i was academically on track, socially i was a mess. for instance, i almost got beat up because i didn’t know what a girl meant when she said, “put me up”, while we waited in the monkey bars line. i had to stand in the hallway because i picked up a chocolate milk in the lunch line - which was obviously taboo for 1st graders. when mean old mrs. kneisley finally came out in the hallway to “deal” with me and interrogate me as to why i broke the rules and i told her i wasn’t aware of any such rule, she yelled at me and said, “no excuses young lady!” i should’ve kept my mouth shut but faintly posed the question, “who’s the chocolate milk for?” wow - did she ever go off on me! no lunch recess for two days! i had to stay in the room at my desk - but guess what was in my desk......? CRAYONS!!! a fresh pack of crayola crayons, the fat ones that come in a pack of eight. i remember identifying strongly with breer rabbit who begged to not be put in the briar patch when secretly that’s what he wanted more than anything. and for me, crayons were the ONLY thing that made sense in this strange setting with confusing phrases and unfriendly faces. PLEASE mrs. kneisley, don’t make me sit at my desk and color - anything but that!!!