last night i had a dream that shook me - the kind of dream that so closely shadows reality that upon awakening, it becomes difficult to distinguish between the two...the kind of dream that opens my pandora's box with its ethereal hands. there are certain chapters of my life that i don't care to read again - books which are locked and placed high on the shelf...but in my dreams - there are no rules, there is no repression and no privacy.
my history becomes open game as unwanted visitors come knocking at my door.
memories get shuffled in the cosmic mix, good ones and awful ones, spiraling together to create a story that i am forced to watch from the chains of my slumber.
in the same way that a powerful book or riveting movie can stay with you for a few hours or even days, so can the loaded plot from one of my dreams, especially the kind i had last night.
it was such a jumbled story of faces from my past and present, and perhaps a few from my future.....there were rooms from one house that got mixed in rooms from another - and there was a no trespassing road, a broken road where spiritual foes fought for my soul. scary stuff.
but a constant comforting character was my father, my sweet and precious daddy who was always watching over me. i saw him last night, heard his voice, even smelled his cologne - in my crazy dream.
before he died - for the first 40 years of my life, he was always able to make everything okay. his kind eyes, comforting words, contagious sense of humor, and unconditional love were constants in my life. when i fell (which i did quite a bit) he was a soft place to land. he blessed everyone he came in contact with. my father so closely mirrored my heavenly father. i never questioned the goodness, forgiveness, mercy, and grace of God because i had experienced such wonderful qualities from my earthly father.
oh i could write a book about what an amazing man, husband, friend, and father he was.......perhaps i will one day. even though he is in heaven now, his memory still comforts me, his legacy lives on in me and those he loved. my son carter has so much of my dad in him, it's eerie.
my dream last night would have been categorized as a nightmare except for the fact that my father was always near, perhaps not in the scene, but close by. is it possible that my heavenly father loves me even more? reminds me of the psalm...."even though i walk through the dark valley, you are with me..."
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during our small group with jodi last year we had a discussion one night where jodi shared that there was a study done that showed that people tend to skew their vision of their heavenly father with their earthly fathers.
you are lucky to have had a father that could in no possible way skew that vision in a bad way.
several times, i stood in the back of the church with lewie during worship. as we stood together, tears streamed down both our faces....something we had in common...the spirit WET OUR FACES with joy!!! i would hug him...and he hugged so tightly...i remember the smell of the cologne, too. we were all so blessed by him.
ahh the cologne...
sometimes i smell it in the oddest of places and smile.
i especially loved his smile. my dad has the same one.
I believe your father is very close to you,you may communicate with him all the time.Trust him and ask about his help.
Have fun and enjoy your life.
Regards from Greece.
Wow! I dream about my mom. I see her hands. That's all. I can't see her face. It bothers me. Why can't I see her face? I'm afraid I will forget. Yet, it's still comforting to know she is somehow not fully vanished from my life...there she is in my dreams!
I believe God knows how truly truly sad we are and he goes here...I will give you something that makes you happy. Here is a dream for you, here is a sign, a symbol...here is something to make you happy and make you smile. Maybe, it's his way of saying I love you please don't be sad. I promise you I will let you be together again!
Alright...I'm a lil' misty right now!
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